She would sit outside my window and listen to me play guitar, a bit like a stalker.
“
| — | Jamie Hince on Alison Mosshart (via lizzingwithkriz) |
LEARN TO SAY NO
Everyone, every single person, needs to learn to say no. Not in the sense of drinking or drugs or when someone asks you to do something at night, but you have to wake up early and you say yes anyway. Those examples are a different kind of NO, and if you don’t know when to say yes or no to doing something illicit or illegal by now, you’ve probably got a substance abuse problem/weird addiction. I’m talking about saying no to opportunities you think will impress other people, or refusing to take on too much, or not letting your vision be swayed by another.
To very briefly describe my current situation, I am a senior in college (I am also 28 years old, but that’s another story) and majoring in English. I began my English major 10 years ago when I first started my undergraduate career, and after a short (or not so short) hiatus, I resumed my education at the age of 26. Although English is an important and interesting subject to me, I really only continued to study it because I had already spent a lot of time and money earning credits, and choosing another major would essentially mean starting over from the beginning. My tastes and critical thinking skills have thankfully changed since I was 18, and I began to read with a more philosophical angle. I became fairly excited about philosophy, and very briefly minored in it, but decided graduation was my ultimate goal and NOTHING would stop me. But then something did.
My advisor told me about an opportunity to take part in a research seminar in a respected historical library, and without thinking I said yes. Like, I was excited about it, but I think I was more excited to please her, and do to something EXCLUSIVE. This seminar is inter-disciplinary, but at the core is history, not my particular area of expertise. As the semester started, I realized this seminar was not how I wanted to spend my time. I could be taking classes for my own personal interest, since my requirements have been fulfilled, but I am struggling through this instead. I have accepted my fate, that I must complete this project and research something that is not even remotely fascinating to me. It is definitely a challenge, and the feeling of relief I will experience when it is over will be like nothing I have ever felt before.
So, what have I learned? Most important, you don’t have to do shit just because someone asks you to. Your goals, your life, your time is critical and don’t let anyone get in the way, even if it is someone you respect/are intimidated by/want to prove wrong. Also, strong academic ability does not mean you MUST pursue strictly academic interests. A critical mind can be used anywhere, for anything. I have strong interest in music, television, books, movies, clothes, all subjects that can be part of a larger cultural analysis, and not just fodder for entertainment magazines. So, to end this on the hack-iest note ever, say yes to yourself first! Recognize your skills and make them work for you. No one knows you like yourself and that is the most important relationship to maintain. Consider other people’s advice and suggestions, but don’t be scared to say no. In the time you spend doing something you don’t like, you could be really exercising your talent and creating something you will truly be proud of.
